The Dragon Within

dragon within

Throughout history the dragon has been used to define many things. Good, Evil, power etc. When I was much younger then I am today, I was told a story, by a woman who taught me the truest meaning of what it is to be human. The secret many live with their who life and never awaken. A secret of pain, enjoyment, and lust. Power, domination and a back door, if you will to the divine. Many, in the world around you have no idea what to do with the information about their dragon, even when you give it to them. Still others have known about their dragon their entire lives. Maybe they  have never heard this story, but it is a story that changed my life forever. I am not privy to being able to use real names, so I will simply make them up. The woman who taught me, brought me out of the light and drenched me in eternal darkness, as some would see it, was cunning, crafty and had a way about er that made you just want to stand and stair. I am going to call her Eve, for this story, since she was the eve of the second chapter of my life.

1998, Early fall, I was in NY city with some friends, just hanging out, and having a good time. The second day we were there, I was off on my own and happened across a lovely black haired woman, standing on top of a newspaper dispenser, yell at a cop on horseback in Russian. Only a few years earlier, my brother had fallen in love with a woman from Ukraine, and through their marriage, I had picked up just enough Russian to stumble through what this woman was yelling. Don’t get me wrong, I did not catch every word, but just enough to get the overall idea. To this day I have never asked her what had started that little fit of words. As I stood there leaning on a light pole she kept yelling and he kept shaking his head. Once or twice he tried, in English, to tell her he had no idea what she was saying. In the end he waved his hand at her and rode away.

The woman, quite pleased with herself hopped down and found me looking right at her smiling. The way she looked at me is what caught me off guard, but did not cool her temper any. Again, I did not catch any of what she barked at me, but I almost fell over laughing. I simply regained my posture and said, in English, “I found her interesting to watch”. Assuming she did not speak English, I made to walk away, and her hand caught my arm. Looking back, the anger was gone, now replaced with a smile and a simple nod of her head. She looked me up and down, more then once, I guess trying to figure out if I was worth her trouble. the first thing Eve ever said to me in English, would not make a bit of sense for more then ten years, but the worlds still echo in my mind and heart.

“You have no idea how to deal with it, do you?”

“I am sorry, deal with what? You do speak English?”

“Of course I speak English. What kind of person would come to a foreign country and not speak the language?”

I really had no answer for that, but I knew she would have a great story to tell, if only I could get it out of her. She still had my arm in her hand and she changed her grip, so she was now holding my hand, not holding me. She tilted her head in a single direction and started walking. I don’t think it ever crossed her mind that I might not follow. We walked for several blocks, and found a small bar. You know the ind, it only stands out if you have been there before, and she obviously had. Once indoors, I found myself in a room, covered in red light, soft leather couched and a single bar at the back of the room. As we walked through the room we came to a set of chairs and she motioned for me to sit. While she proceeded to the bar, I took a seat, not realizing just how tired I already was from my romp through the city. When she came back she was holding two shot glasses, and the woman from the bar was holding two drinks. I had only had shots with my sister in law once, but it had made me choke up a lung, and now fear was rushing through my memory of that event. Eve seemed most amused at my face when she handed me a glass. Taking it, I noticed it was not cold, only room temperature. She held up her glass, and I did the same. She spoke, not only to me ears, but I think to my heart as well.

“To the second chapter in your life!”

Again I was lost for words, but bowed my head and took my shot. It could have been water, or nothing at all. There was not burn, no bad flavor, really no flavor at all. It went down and Eve took a seat next to mine and the woman behind her handed us both tall drinks, looking more like blood then anything else. It smelled like raspberries and chocolate, so I hopped it was ok.

For the rest of the afternoon, we sat in that bar and spoke of our lives. She told me she was born in Moscow, but lives in Paris. She was very interested in a side of me, I knew nothing about. Over and over I wondered how a perfect stranger could know more about me, then I did, but as the day wore on, I stopped caring. I had found a new friend, and I felt like she would introduce me to a world I had been missing. That night, I stayed with her, in a town house quite some distance from where we had started. The next day and the day after that went as the first had. Over the next five days I found myself not wanting to be away from Eve. I had told my friends I had found someone to spend time with and they went on about their planes, like I knew they would. The week came to an end, and Eve had become someone I never wanted to go without. I had no idea what was coming next, but I also did not care. I had no job, nowhere to be and nothing to do. It was when she told me she had to return home, that I thought I would die. The week had been amazing, but the thought of loosing her, and a chance to become something more then I had been without her, hit me hard. I should have known she had her own ideas of how to deal with it.

“I may have to return to Paris, but if you are not busy, I was hoping you might come with me? I have clients to see to for the first few days back, but after I will be free for more then a month. I think I can introduce you to another side of you, in that time, if you re still interested?”

I could not believe I was being asked to come home with her, but I knew I would have to make this decision and move forward and not look back. I was fortunate that I had just quite a job with the government and I had a passport in my belongings already. I decided an adventure was at hand, and I was not going to stand in fates way. The very next morning we caught a cab to JFK and Eve bought tickets for us both to France. It had been some time since my last visit to Europe, and that had been with family. The flight was simple, I think I slept most of it. I was not big on flying but we arrived untouched. Eve had a car waiting when we arrived. She kept smiling at me, in her own strange way. I still had no idea what she thought she was going to teach me, but as long as I lived through it, whatever.

The drive to her home was uneventful as was the first night. The following day I woke to find Eve in the most unusual outfit I had ever seen. Not only on her, but ever! A long black skirt, red corset and black lace gloves down to her middle finger. There was a man in the house helping her get ready, but he never spoke a word to me. When I tried to speak to him, Eve told me to allow him to continue with his business. It had not occurred to me, till that moment, that all the time I had spent with her,  I had never asked what it was that she did for a living. I had assumed her family had money, but now I saw she made her own way. When she was ready, I walked her to her front door, and wondered what I would do alone in Paris. She handed me an envelope and told me not to worry. She would be back tomorrow and then she could fill in some blank spaces. That morning was the first time she had kissed me, but I felt something very powerful move from her lips to mine, in that brief moment. She looked at me, smiled and left the house.

Now you must understand I knew nothing about Paris, as an every day city. I only knew where I was because you could see the canal from her front windows. I knew if I could find that I could find my way around. I had never been alone in a foreign city, but I had never backed down from a challenge either. The rest of the day, and that evening I mostly spent in the Louvre. I had always wanted to see it, and now I had two days to drool, if you will. That evening I found a small cafe and had dinner. I still felt odd, not knowing a lick of French, but I did the best I could sounding out words, and people seemed to take that as a good thing. Finding my way back to Eve’s house was the hardest part. When it got dark, the city changed altogether. I was completely exhausted when I got home and fell dead into bed. I woke the next day with the sun in my eyes, and the room. Eve had not returned, but she had not specified a time. I  left the house, found yet another cafe, got coffee and pastries for breakfast. For the first time since I was young,  felt the need to write. I asked the barista where I could buy a pen and note pad? I did so and returned to the cafe. It was right across the way from Eve’s home so I might see her when she came back. I spent the rest of the day, sitting there drinking tea and writing poetry. By the time the sun was starting to set, a black car arrived in front of the house, and Eve climbed out of the back. Same dress as the day before, same woman, only tired. I wanted to know what she did for a living, but still did not want to be rude.

As if I were yelling and waving my hands she looked right at me when she got clear of the car. She handed her things to the same man who had been with her, while she got ready and he took them in the house. Walking over the street and taking a seat next to me. She was smiling again. A smile only she can wear. her words, as always caught me off guard, but I was getting use  to it.

“Are you ready to wake it? I think I have the energy to help you tonight. Or maybe tomorrow.”

As with most of what she said, I had no clue, only nodded my head, stood and went home with her. She brought dinner with her, when she came home. The young man had set a table and right as we entered he was preparing to leave. He stood before Eve and bowed his head. She only touched his shoulder and he departed. A small bit of fear was growing in me about what I was about to learn that night, but I was here, Eve was here and she seemed to think I needed whatever it was that she was offering. Dinner was short, as was our conversation and then came the odd questions;

Have you ever ben hit and liked it? Have you ever wanted to hit someone else and not have it be out of anger? Have you ever been pushed during sex? These questions went on for some time, each one as bazar as the next. By the time she finished, my head was pounding, as was my heart, and she seemed to think something more was needed. I had not told her I had only had sex a few times in my life, and none of them were all that memorable. She had me stand,  and follow her to the living room. Eve removed my shirt and  shorts, then asked if I would help her out of hr attire. As her clothing fell to the floor, I knew something I had tried to ignore since our meeting was coming forth. I could not control my bodies reactions and I feared upsetting her. I truly had no idea. As the last bits of her clothing fell to the floor, and she stood in front of me, skin beading with sweat, I hoped I would not disappoint her. More happened that night, then I may ever admit to, but by the time we both found a bed, something had changed within me. Something had waken I could not put back to sleep and I fell through darkness as I would for some years to come.

The sex had been sex, the small bits of pain Eve caused me brought out a kind of arousal I did not know existed. She would go from rubbing my cock, to yanking on it till I would scream! Go from kissing my lips to slapping my face and knocking me sideways. Scratches down my skin, nibbles turned to full on biting! I did not know the body could shake so much in so little time. As she progressed, the sex mostly stopped, but the use of my body did not. I grew tired, and worn. I wanted more, but knew I would not consciously last the game. Her feather bed, held me like nothing had before that night. The morning came with questions, and a painful body and mind. Eve woke beside me smiling, more then loving or sweet. She seemed completely at peace, something I had not seen in her since our meeting. I could only phrase one question, and then came the talk.

“What exactly happened last night? Why do I hurt so badly now, it did not hurt like this last night. I don’t understand.”

“It is simple to explain in words, but will take you a lifetime to fully understand. The way I was taught was this. Everyone is born with a sleeping dragon within them. Many go their entire life without rousing it, and never care. The few who awaken their dragon find something completely unique to balance out the dad to dad life we all have to lead. The dragon is only a part of the whole. It is only a set of scales set to keep a balance most never know they need. You have need I will only partly be able to balance out with you. I am taking it, you enjoyed last night?”

“Yes, only I am not sure what fully happened.”

“Try this then.”

No warning at all, no foreplay, so to speak, she grabbed my hair, and yanked my head back. Her lips found my neck, where it was pulled firm and bit on hard enough for me to scream in pain. She slapped my face, clawed my chest and twisted my nipple. Never did she move for any sexual areas, she only found small ways to bring pain to my surface. In turn I felt the need to repay her the same. I had no idea what drove my need, or what to start with first, but as we proceeded on, I was gifted with a scream or two out of her as well. Screams turned to moans, and moans turned to screams. The morning passed by into afternoon. and still we played our game.  When evening came, we were both covered in bruises, scratches and the bed drenched in sweat and cum from us both. The moment we stopped I felt something twist within me, and that was what Eve had been waiting for.

“That! That feeling within you now, that is your dragon waking from her slumber. She will never sleep again, and you will only move closer to a more balanced life because of it. Do you understand any of what has happened today?”

I don’t think I could have spoken if the Goddess mother had walked into the room, but I was able to feel. Feel a more profound sense of understanding then ever before. I wanted more pain, but also wanted something softer. I met Eve’s eyes and found her lips. She did not ask me to stop, she only fell into me, as I fell into her.  In the end, it was our bodies and stomach’s to drive us out of bed. I found walking to be rather difficult that night, but so did she. My mind and soul were racing and even the food we ate did nothing to curb the new drive within me.

Over the next few days we had many romps in the sheets, on the couch, in the park and by the canal. Each one helping me to better understand the nature of the dragon within. Now, forty years old,  seventeen years later, this event just another memory in a life twisted across the world. I wonder what my life would have become without the assistance of Eve? The waking of my dragon, and the decisions made of that waking.  Ten years later I started the path she had set me on, that month in Paris. A path that led me to my true self. The women writing this story. The women living this life, and the women my world had needed since I was a child. I know within me, I would never have found her, without finding Eve. Eve is still a part of my life. We speak from time to time, but always she lives in my soul, resting next to my dragon within.

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